My biggest pet peeves in coversational English:
Number One:
Using "seen" incorrectly - common in today's conversations. You ain't seen nothin' cause I seen it first. If you seen it, tell me.
Doh!!!! My ears bleed when I hear that!!
You either saw something OR have seen something. Please don't make my ears bleed.
Number Two:
Dude! Where's my car?? I'm not a dude. You're not a dude. Unless you are under 25 and a full-time California surfer, please do not call people "dude." Again, don't make my ears bleed, please.
Number Three:
Shit-damn, mo-fo, ya don't say!! Cursing is wonderful but it evolved out of the need for extra emphasis. Please reserve your colorful speech for those times when you are especially happy, sad or very angry. Your motherfu*%#in' grandma is not the motherfu*%#in' best cook on this godd*#n planet. But, that weight that your buddy dropped on you toe hurt like a motherfu*#er and you were one lucky f#cker to get out when your house caught fire.
Number Four:
It ain't ain't! It's "I am not." 'Nuff said.
